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Gay Strip Poker with iBLASTinside’s Twist

Gay Strip Poker with iBLASTinside’s Twist

jackStrip poker can be fun, but the adventure of the game is more the journey than the destination. But with all strip poker games, once everyone is naked, what happens next?

I created a series of rules to make strip poker both more fair and a lot more fun. The rules break the ice in the game before everything degrades down into full-fledged sexual decadence.

You can choose to play whatever version of the game. I like Texas Hold ‘Em, but the standard Five Card Draw is fine.

Rules follow like this.

Number One All players are required to wear the same article of clothing. Generally I’d suggest eight, comprised of the following:

bullett Two shoes (counts as two items)
bullett Two socks (counts as two items)
bullett Underwear, either boxers, briefs, jockstrap, etc. (counts as one item)
bullett One pair of jeans, pants or shorts (counts as one item)
bullett One shirt or top (counts as one item)

Bareback Stealthing Tip Number 2 kingTo make the game last a little longer, you can add up additional items, up to four more) including the following:

bullett Undershirt (counts as one item)
bullett Belt (counts as one item)
bullett Overcoat or jacket (counts as one item)
bullett Hat (counts as one item)

Number Three There are no ante bets, but everyone must bet at least one item of clothing. That said, the minimum bet is one item of clothing is one item of clothing and the maximum is two items. So once someone raises things to two items, things are maxed out and it can’t go higher that round. As betting occurs, no one removes any clothing. The clothing is removed at loss.

Number Four After participants are naked, betting becomes interesting. There’s two bowls or hats on the table with folded up pieces of paper inside. One is “single dares” and the other are “double dares.”  I’ve included my set of these single and double dares here Open-New-Window-External in an Adobe Acrobat document. First, print them out and cut them apart. The ones with yellow backgrounds go into the double dares bowl. The plain white in the single dares.

Number Five AceBetting is relatively simple. The lowest bet is one single dare. The highest bet is two double dares. Again, there’s no ante. Therefore….

bullett One always begins with a single dare bet.
bullett A single dare bet can be raised to two single dares, a single dare and a double dare or two double dares. No more than two dares of each type can be play at any time.
bullett Two single dares can be raise to a single and a double dare or two double dares. A single and a double dare can only be raised to two doubles.

Number Six Once won, the losers must pull out the bet results from the appropriate bowls and follow the commands, which are sexual in nature. Single bets involve touching, hugging and a little kissing — generally embarrassing stuff. Plus there’s some revealing stuff. Double dares get more racy with mouth to genital action. No fucking occurs because that’s reserved for after the game.

Number Seve At some point, the game just ends and fucking begins. Let it happen naturally. Plan for it with good music and turn the lights down a bit lower. If beer has been flowing during the night, it shouldn’t be much of a concern. The good news about these parties is everyone is about equal opportunity and wants to see everyone cum.

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How to Host a Gay Orgy

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How to Host a Gay Orgy, Content

Pick an Orgy Theme
BulletStrip Poker Opens new window of a page on this blog
Planning Your Space
Security Concerns
Purchasing and Planning Supplies
The Guest List
Scheduling the Orgy
Asking a Guest to Leave
Asking for Money
Orgy Etiquette
BulletA More Detailed Orgy Etiquette Opens new window of a page on this blog
The Orgy Begins
Boosting Sexual Success
Ending the Orgy

 

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Pick an Orgy Theme

Why pick a theme? It’s an orgy! Right?

Every orgy has a theme even if it’s, “Anything goes.” That’s a theme.

Perhaps it’s a “load the birthday boy” or “twentysomething jerkoff” party. It doesn’t matter. Creating a successful orgy means generating some interest.

When I lived in Washington, D.C., I happened to own a home that had a single large room with almost no windows that made it a particularly successful space for hosting orgies. I became quite successful at creating some get-togethers.

A few ideas beyond the traditional conversion party Open-New-Window-External  or jock/bear/twink/leather exclusive get together:

lightbulb_on Friday Fog Fuck Fest
lightbulb_on My version of strip poker Opens new window of a page on this blog
lightbulb_on Sexy slumber party
lightbulb_on Masquerade party
lightbulb_on Gloryhole Hoe Down
lightbulb_on Underwear exchange orgy
lightbulb_on Russian Roulette orgy Open-New-Window-External

You can make it simple just by restricting age, kind of people, types or anything else. But choosing a theme helps you in restricting your guest list. This is something you will want to do.

Please note that being polite goes a long way to lessen the animosity that could develop. Posting something like, “No fatties and ancient trolls,” will piss off some queens who’ve been used to attacks. Therefore these bitterness-containers may target your gathering by pretending to be someone else and then wrecking havoc or, worse, creating a security risk by informing the local homophobic hate groups.

Don’t laugh. I’ve seen it happen. And truth be told, I’ve had an asshole host cause (a younger, less mature) me to send dozens of people to his house and ruin his orgy (he was a fortysomething man hosting only svelte, blond twentysomethings with treasure trails, although his invite didn’t say as much). When he uninvited me, he wasn’t delicate and polite.

RULE #1 of GOOD ORGY HOSTING
Don’t Be an Asshole.

Your orgy theme needs to reflect the kind of debaucherous experience you want to occur, even if it’s an impromptu sex encounter with a few locals.

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Planning Your Space

Gay Bareback OrgyIf the orgy is at your home, decide where guests will and will not have access. Think of the entire experience. Do you live in a gated community? A high-rise with street parking? A home in the suburbs? A basement apartment with a back entrance?

The entire visit must be explained in detail to your guests. Don’t just give an address, but let them know about the parking situation, whether there’s a gate or door code, whether to knock or enter straight on, etc.

Explaining the access interior might be important as well.

Dump-and-go parties — where there’s a bottom set up and accepting loads from multiple tops who stop by over a period of time — usually has a space where the tops can clean-up, disrobe and also put back on clothes in preparation to leave. When hosting in a hotel or motel, this isn’t always possible.

Other orgies usually have a playroom or rooms where the sex occurs and a break space for refreshments. Sometimes there’s a space for people to remove, put on and store clothing.

RULE #2 of GOOD ORGY HOSTING
Have a place for guests to disrobe, store clothing safely and dress later.

Although I enjoy going over and doing the “wham, bam, thank you Sam” thing, I don’t really consider that an orgy. You will need the following three spaces minimal:

Green square bullet Dressing room
Green square bullet Play space(s)
Green square bullet Clean-up space (most likely a bathroom)

Your optional spaces may include the following:

Yellow Square Bullet Lounge break space (where sex will not occur but guests may be naked)
Yellow Square Bullet Non-sex lounging space (where guests should be clothed and no sex should occur)
Yellow Square Bullet Refreshment space (may also be the lounge space, but a place where guests can get a drink of water or other beverage or snack)
Yellow Square Bullet Specialty sex spaces (you may want to designate a space for bondage, barebacking, JO, sling(s), massage, etc.)

Finally, you should consider designating off limits spaces.

bullet_square_red Post signs for spaces like extra rooms, your office, etc., that guests should not enter.
bullet_square_red Also consider posting signs on the refrigerator, pantry, cabinets, etc., politely directing guests to the location of refreshments. Use positive phrases like, “Beer, sodas and bottled water located in the cooler on the deck” rather than “Don’t take my shit from the refrigerator” because people will be more likely to take stuff with negative commands.

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Security Concerns

When planning any get together, security is a must. I personally have been to orgies where my belongings were stolen Opens new window of a page on this blog from inside the orgy home and the word “FAG” was keyed into my car. As both the host and the participant, ways to assure a secure environment

As a host, two ways secure your environment:

The Locked-Door Policy

At a designated time (as you clearly state in the invitation), the entrance/exit will be locked. No new admissions will occur after this point. While you plainly state this, I recommend that you be a little late on locking the door. This allows for traffic issues (which you should monitor in case there’s an accident nearby — it’s happened to me) and for those who just can’t arrive on time. It also allows for the participants to loosened up a little.

Monitored

This one is a little more difficult because it requires someone or a couple of folks to skip the fun and monitor the door (and perhaps the clothing room). A couple of ways to accomplishing this:

bullet_square_blue Hire men to be your “security.” You can hire “heteroflexible” men, like local “straight” strippers. Let your participants know these men (who will wear little) are available after the festivities and will be accepting tips. You can also hire older men, straight men, liberal women, friends or pretty much anyone who doesn’t give a fuck what’s going on. Let the participants know that these folks are protecting their belongings. Once the party is in “full swing,” the doorman can step outside and check cars, call police if there’s suspicious activity, alert participants if the cops are coming, etc. If you can, consider creating a “coat check” like situation. Consider purchasing several stackable plastic bins and let participants put their clothes and keys inside it. Post-It notes allows the coat-check person to note a name and description (Tom, pierced nipples, smooth, bald head).

bullet_square_blue Create shifts with volunteers. Some folks will do it for free but consider asking for tips. It’s in everyone’s best interest. The best bet are folks who want a single shot (or need to cum just once). There’s also the option to send bottoms to service the top monitors while they work.

I’d always suggest you encourage participants to leave valuables at home, lock their IDs and wallets in their cars (hidden and out of site).

If you’re attending an orgy, I recommend the same — leave as many valuables as you can at home and the rest in your vehicle. After my stolen clothes experience, I’d suggest the following (unless you know the host or you’re attending an orgy with someone there to protect your clothes and goods):

bullet_square_blue Keep your clothes and keys with you, leaving your wallet and phone in the car (if you don’t feel safe without a phone, don’t fucking go; or, as an option, park close and have a Bluetooth connection to your phone at all times). I’ve been to an orgy or two where there was a designated room for play and it was easy enough to strip, fuck, play and then clothe oneself to hang out and eat, drink or socialize in other parts of the house.

bullet_square_blue If there’s a “no clothes” rule, consider separating your clothes and your car keys. Car keys can easily be stashed away someplace small and not very obvious. This gives a thief something to take and gives you a chance to still get your car. I’d drive home naked (or borrowing some shorts from the stupid host) with my keys than trying to get my keys from someone else.

bullet_square_blue Another option is simply keep your keys on you by securing them in a sock or something else on your body. I recommend this option, especially in sketchy situations if you have to bail without your clothes (I’ve heard of this but never personally experienced it). This might lead you to wearing disposable clothes (ones that you wouldn’t mind losing) and having an extra set in your vehicle.

I also recommend you be well aware of your surroundings and have an escape route. If something goes wrong, you can get the fuck out and leave. Also, just in case, I always leave “evidence” or information of the address where I went so anyone can find it quickly.

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Purchasing and Planning Supplies

About to fuck in a gay orgyWe don’t want to believe that we need to purchase things like poppers Opens new window of a page on this blog and lube, but alas, not everyone brings their shit even when we insist on it. Therefore, plan on buying some and having someone take yours.

I personally always purchase smaller bottles of lube anyway because I’m always needing to pocket them for random hookups or visits to bookstores Opens new window of a page on this blog or sex clubs Opens new window of a page on this blog. As an option (if you purchase in bulk or gallon size), put the lube in plastic travel bottles. Poppers can’t be put in plastic and, generally, are too valuable just to leave all over the house. I would tuck my favorites certain places for me to remember if I needed them handy.

Consider purchasing inexpensive hand towels spaced throughout the house, especially on any flat surface and in any room you think sex will happen. Put away the nice towels and put out the cheap ones.

Now some people might think of “party favors” or “party supplies” might be drugs like Tina (crystal meth), Molly (MDNA), ecstasy or marijuana (pot or 420). You may wish to allow them, but it certainly makes your gathering a target for law enforcement. I personally would avoid such and say it’s not allowed (if you choose to indulge, do it on your own privately). Unless you’re already in some liberal bastion like San Francisco, a gay bareback orgy is going to be especially frowned upon, so law enforcement getting wind of illegal drugs and sodomy going on just might cause a major sting operation. Avoid.

And if you’re thinking of going and know that this is happening, avoid.

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The Guest List

Guests to your gathering will be inevitably difficult to build. I always recommend you begin with your own hookups. You know these men so you’ll know a little bit about them — top, bottom or versatile. Generally, that is where every orgy begins with a mixture of how many men you’d like to invite and the ratio of tops-to-bottoms.

In barebacking, bottoms can be really greedy. Therefore, making it very clear the collection of people attending will make it much easier.

The question will also come for photographs along with statistics of the other attendees.

This makes for a very weird situation because some 22-year-old might refuse to come if there’s one ugly 40-year-old in the bunch. This is why I encourage the theme choice from the outset.

If it’s a “white athletes in their twenties with six pack abs only” party, then fucking specify it. However, the host must match the theme as well.

RULE #3 of GOOD ORGY HOSTING
The host must “match” the theme.

I once saw a guy hosting a barebacking party and knew who it was. He happened to be in his fifties, older, hairier and frankly out-of-shape fat. He used deceptive advertising on Craigslist to get younger men to respond, thinking they were coming to a nice jocks-only orgy.

Once I got the address of the get together, I flooded Craigslist with information on the man hosting the party. I also sent a few older, hairier men over to the address when they asked about it. I know. It’s evil of me. And it wasn’t friendly to the other guys. But the asshole got the point.

One must be reasonable about what one is going to get. One must be honest about what will be attending.

What I generally do with the first installment of an invitation folks know the general range of who will be attending based on the theme. Then, if the person is interested in attending, he must return at least one photo for inclusion in a collage of photos I put together.

I give everyone a deadline and let everyone know when the e-mail with everyone’s stats and the collage of photos will go out.

Some people send me a dozen pics. Some send one. Some send face. Some send ass. Some send body. Some send cock. I put together one or two collages of photos and a list of the participants’ basic stats.

From that point, I ask for confirmation of attendance.

At your first orgy, expect about 20 to 40 percent of your participants to actually arrive. If you maintain a mailing list and your orgies continue to be successful, the percentages will go up. Generally, you will never get more than 60 percent.

iphone-in-a-pocketE-mail multiple times leading up to the actual orgy start. Provide phone numbers for people who need them (if you don’t want to give out your real number, consider getting a Google Voice number Open-New-Window-External and link it or forward it to your phone. Yes, you can even get texts, but not all MMS.

One may use the BarebackRT.com Open-New-Window-External local party feature, but not everyone is on BBRT. There’s also sites like Evite.com, which allows for maybe, yes, no and hasn’t responded to invitations. Either way, you will want to build your own database or mailing list to maintain and you might even want to make mental notes of who attends and who doesn’t. I personally recommend getting really e-mail addresses and issuing invitations through those, as they’re easier to track should something happen at a get together.

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Scheduling the Orgy

Tea time orgies (anything in the afternoons) generally only work on weekends and holidays unless you’re planning on hosting an orgy at a public sex club or adult bookstore Opens new window of a page on this blog. Lunchtime drop-off orgies can work under certain circumstances.

Depending on the theme, the later the better. If you’re having a strip poker party Opens new window of a page on this blog or some normal party, then starting at 7 p.m. or so is just fine. Plan on later — more like 10 p.m. to midnight or even 1 a.m. if you want the after bar crowd.

One might even survey people to see what they might prefer. SurveyMonkey.com allows limited number of responses if you want to have a small selection of people to answer.

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Orgy Etiquette

I love to include a special section on etiquette Opens new window of a page on this blog in my e-mailed invitations. It’s an important reminder to everyone attending and it’s helped me make my orgies a little better. While I’ve created a more detailed version of the orgy etiquette Opens new window of a page on this blog here, your summary can be simple:

bullet You will not be attracted to everyone who attends, but there will be people there you’ll find hot.
bullet An orgy is like a potluck dinner — try a little of everything; don’t limit yourself like some sort of a la carte menu.
bullet Don’t plan on choosing the one guy you find hot and go off into a corner to make out; it’s an orgy which means everyone plays with everyone.
bullet Everyone’s allowed to touch everyone else; politely let someone else know if you’d prefer something else.
bullet (If appropriate) Let the attendees know if there’s a designated top or bottom for use if all else fails.
bullet No jerking off or just voyeur play; you’re a participant.

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Asking a Guest to Leave

I have rarely hosted an orgy without having someone who needs to be politely asked to leave or who automatically knows they are the odd man out, so to speak. Further, with bareback orgies, someone always tries to sneak in just to watch the fun and never participate. For some people, this isn’t a problem. I personally think it’s not a show but a participant sport.

One should be there to play.

Therefore, if something isn’t right, as host you can ask someone to leave.

Here’s the easiest way:

[alert style=”orange”] I wanted to thank you so much for coming to the get together.
However, I think it’s going to be in your best interest if you go ahead and leave.
I’m sorry it didn’t work out but I’ll keep you in mind for a more appropriate get together in the future. [/alert]

Now sometimes a dimwitted guest will want to know why they’re being asked to leave. Here’s a few examples:

[alert style=”orange”]I’m so sorry to say this, but the photos you provided don’t appear to be an accurate portrayal.
Perhaps it would benefit you to update them in the near future.(If you ask multiple guests to leave; this is a lie to spare the feelings of those you’re asking to leave)
I am afraid something has come up and we’re going to need to cancel the sexual portion of the party.
I hope you don’t mind. I’ll let you know if and when we reschedule.Unfortunately, you’re just not compatible with the designated theme of the party.I apologize, but we do expect you to participate in the sexual activity, not just watch.[/alert]

Occasionally, one does have to be a little mean to kick someone out. Or just start the orgy and let someone sit alone for a while and realize they’re all alone.

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Asking for Money

fucking bareback orgyI am not a big proponent of asking for designated amounts. I went to one orgy once that required $20 to get in. Funny thing, when I left after finding it a bust, the “donation” basket sat full by the front door. While I could have absconded with hundreds of dollars, I just took my twenty back since I didn’t shoot a load. I felt I didn’t get my money’s worth.

I don’t think it’s a big deal to suggest people tip for security or other things, but an actual admission or cover starts making it more like a sex club. Why do that?

Whatever you do, make it a donation or a suggested donation or optional tip.

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The Orgy Begins

I believe in alcohol.

Beer, wine, shots or something is needed before the “official” kick off of the orgy should begin.

Consider the booze a little lubricant for the party. It’s needed for people to get to know each other. I sometimes like for there to be an hour or so before the official orgy begins and the loosening up period begin.

This allows for people who feel out of place to leave (without you asking them). It also allows a little time for the inhibitions to go down.

Now it does depend on the type of party. For a blackout or darkroom or fog party where the room is dark, you don’t need this. But sometimes it is needed so people can become more comfortable.

Also, as the party begins, consider turning the air conditioning or heater temperature down, cracking a window or something to cool the space off. The space will heat up quickly. However, if the space is cooled off too well, no one will get naked.

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Boosting Sexual Success

People hired to applaud at appropriate times during a performance are known as claqueurs Open-New-Window-External and, in a way, the host and a few others need to be such at an orgy.

Your orgy claqueurs will act as instigators of action. They’ll start blowjobs or fucking or get naked or jerking off or whatever it takes to break the ice and get the action going.

With every orgy, the sexual energy ebbs and flows with the attendees and the vibe. You want to choose sexual people who can seemingly create sexual tension out of nothing.

Asking people to be your orgy instigators of action will help tremendously so you aren’t always the one.

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Ending the Orgy

Unless you’ve decided to make a night of it by hosting some sort of sleep over, the party must come to an end. Some people just don’t seem to take a hint.

I suggest giving a definitive end to your party in time. If you’re having a good time and it goes over, then don’t worry. But when you’re ready, just tell the lingerers, “Hey, I didn’t realize it’s after 1 a.m. I’m going to have to get up early tomorrow. Do you guys mind taking this someplace else?”

They’ll mosey out the door in due time.

The other option is to simply bring them their clothes. Hint, hint!

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By a Cell Phone Light…

By a Cell Phone Light…

The choices in an adult bookstore — at least the adult bookstore here in Atlanta Opens a new window from this blog — includes gloryholes Opens a new window from this blog, private rooms and a darkroom. Those are one’s three choices to indulge in the hedonism.

The holiday season hadn’t invaded this place. Not even the music bothered to pulse with any musical beat beyond the normal dance jams with more urban tones. I’d made a couple of loops. My cock had been stroked and sucked through a gloryhole or two. The private rooms had been occupied a lot. I’d had enough time to find the men in whom I wanted to see my cock slide first.

Among them, a beefy Latino, wide chest, short and stout. Look like a good chest. But his favorite destination seemed to be the darkroom.

Now I don’t tend to favor the darkroom. It isn’t because I don’t enjoy darkrooms. However, trolls lurk there.

Some of you younger bucks may be asking, “What are trolls?”

Trolls tend to be older men (but can be of any age) who horn in on others having good sex and make it bad.

Age honestly has nothing to do with a troll, but trolls simply suck at sex (not in a good way) and they can’t figure out how to improve their sexual prowess. Yet they insist on entering into others’ fun and ruining it for all. In fact, trolls seem to delight in this.

No matter how ugly, how old, how black, how brown, how young or whatever one’s lot in life, your ass should be pink and juicy on the inside. Within certain constraints Opens a new window from this blog, I will fuck and breed you. But trolls are off limits.

I politely push them away. Some are more persistent than others. Those will ruin a fuck.

Back to the hot, stout Latino in the military haircut wearing the unfortunate white, striped sweater.

A little tip: If you’re going a place with a darkroom, choose dark clothes and don’t wear anything with a logo so people can recognize you.

I followed him into the room. As I entered, it took a moment for me to make out the shadows of the men. His was the shortest, of course, over near the corner and I moved toward him, brushing up against him. He responded in kind and reached for my crotch. I unbuttoned and before long he was down on his knees sucking.

His technique lacked focus and he couldn’t go deep, even with someone like me who didn’t really challenge anyone. My cock is just at seven inches, so my cockhead will just touch the back of most people’s throats. Sure, you’ll gag but it’s not like I’ll really stop you from breathing.

He kept his head bobbing shallow, supplementing with his hands and even licked my balls, which I loved. I completely dropped my trousers (all my valuables were locked in the car) so other men were feeling my ass and even one went down to share a lick on my balls. It wasn’t bad.

I tried to hint to my little guy I wanted ass, bending over and reaching into the gap in his jeans where his ass crack happened to be. I would touch his smooth ass. But he kept sucking.

In this darkness, I wasn’t the only one getting sucked. Darkness inspires whispers and silence for some reason. I’m a quiet guy anyway.

But there arose such a clatter, I snapped my head around to see what’s the matter.

A black man with an obviously large cock snapped on his cell phone to look down at his huge pipe entering the ass of a beefy white man wearing what looked like a black jockstrap.

“Yea, man, give me that fucking ass,” he exclaimed in a deep, gravely voice. A masculine man, the kind of downlow fucker you’d see on Sally Jesse Raphel and fucking this quiet white bottom raw. “This is a good fucking ass!”

It was across the room from me with four or five other men between me, so shadows would occasionally obscure what I could see. But the fuck noises were obvious. My little Latino continued to suck but I had my eyes firmly planted on what was going on across the room.

And I wanted that ass next.

The black fucker just got to pummeling that ass. The slapping of thighs to ass got louder and I pulled my cock away, bored by the half-hearted ministrations by the Latino. If he were smart, he’d stand, then bend over and drop his jeans.

He stood and continued to reach for my cock. I zipped up and moved toward the light of the door, but keeping an eye on the fucking.

The grunt and fuck noises just got louder. In the pale light, you could see the bottom now bracing himself against the wall and the top just letting the fucker have it.

“You’re going to get my nut!” the black man practically yelled. And then he did. “ARRRRRHHHHGGGGG!!!”

He let loose what had to be a torrent of cum into that white booty. He fucked it a few more times.

“Fuck man, I gotta sit down,” he said. “I’m fucking weak in the knees from that.”

The cell phone switched off at that moment but he sat down where the light from the doorway showed his cock, a thick nine inches, as the bottom turned around, hefted it up and sucked it clean.

By now, my Latino had moved next to me and was reaching inside my zipper. But I wanted that loaded ass.

Fortunately for me, afterward, the white bottom moved by me to go toward the corner I’d vacated. I reached out and brushed my hand against his ass and followed.

It proved enough to get his attention.

The Latino had kept my cock up if the action hadn’t. The bottom reached around and gave my cock a tug, recognizing another hard cock. He then lined it up with his hole.

I just fucking love cum sluts.

The entry was smooth and easy after that other monster had vacated. And I moaned. As that escaped my lips, a familiar light came on. The black top hadn’t left and now his cell phone illuminated my cock inside this white ass.

It wasn’t going to be a long fuck.

“That’s a nice ass, ain’t it man?” He egged me on.

Truth is, I’ve had better. I don’t mind loose asses. This one was just nondescript. And the bottom had never learned to flex his muscles. I had to do all the work. As I reached up to get a grip, I grabbed what I thought would be his jock.

T’weren’t no jock. It was some cheap, polyester lingerie garter belt. Fuck, I’m so not into men dressing as women. And this guy is totally not the type of guy who would.

But my cock is in an ass, raw, and I’m churning up cum.

“Dude,” the black man spoke. “You fucking push me again, I’m going to knock your goddamned head off! You fucking understand me?”

Troll alert.

“Stand back and let the dude nut in his butt and we all can fucking watch.”

That’s my cue.

I snort some poppers and I let it go. I know I’m not as turned on as I should be but I keep my hands on the fleshy cakes and I try to tune out the trolls, knowing that I’m protected for the time being. I focus on popping and mixing it up in this bottom’s ass. Picking up the pace, slamming harder, giving it to him, punishing him for being a pussy in women’s underwear.

I cascade over the side and grunt a few times as my Latino is there, tickling my balls. Yes, he still wants my dick.

I cum. I half cum really. I shoot a load but it’s not fulfilling. I give the audience a good performance, knowing that I am injecting into his ass but I beef it up making sure it seems good, although more understated than my black ally.

By the time I pop out, another hard dick is lined up and he’s shooting by the time I’ve zipped up and left.

A little disgusted with myself that my powers of perception probably hoped that it was a black jockstrap rather than a black garter belt. I make another loop and I fuck a guy’s face for a while. He won’t offer me his ass, even telling me he watched me fuck that guy and that I can fuck him any other place but here.

And I bump into the black guy as he comments, “That was a mighty fine ass, wasn’t it man?”

“Yea, man,” I nod in agreement, now completely lying to him. “You have a good one.”

I head out. Half satisfied.

Rage Against the Bossy Bottom

Rage Against the Bossy Bottom

One of those days. Fucking one of those days. I just needed to leave work and fuck an ass. All that pent up frustration sometimes shoots out of my cock.

Where’s a good bottom when you need one?

FDAU -- Face Down Ass UpI work on the other side of the planet from where I live, so I’ve been attempting to find a few bottoms near the office and on the way home I can stop off an drop a load. It’s my thing. You be there, naked, ass up, face down and ready to receive.

The thing about the way I fuck: It’s not what you think.

1. My cock is hard.

When I say hard, I mean rock hard. It’s not hard like a dildo, so let’s make that clear. But when I get erect, I’m in the game until I pop or you poop.

My cock is pliable and I can fuck in many different positions but it’s not for a size queen. It’s about 7 inches and it’s just right. I’ll hit your prostate and bang it often. I know how to find it and usually hit it.

2. This Ain’t Your Dad Fucking Your Ass

Incest aside, I fucking know how to fuck ass. Every ass is different and every bottom feels different from the inside.

If I’ve fucked you, please comment.

I don’t want to come off sounding cocky, but my cock doesn’t have a mind of it’s own. It’s attached to me and I’m a professional. Now let me do my job.

3. I Deliver a Load

My name online isn’t “iBLASTinside” just cause I thought it was fun. I’ve made a habit of always shooting inside, even when the bottom asks me not to do so (and they’ve seen this e-mail address and recognize what it says).

I’ll admit to faking it on occasion, but it’s rare. I love breeding ass.

4. My Loads Are Big or Huge, Your Choice

When I cum, it’s not a dribble. It’s not a small amount. I cum a lot and you’ll know it. I throb like a mutherfucker and I shoot a lot. Generally, I provide two large bursts of cum.

You want extra cum? Here’s what you do: Lick my balls before I fuck you. That will assure I juice up before I breed you.

5. I’m Always Hard After I Pop

If I like you, I’ll let you cum. It’s not a requirement. Bottoms aren’t really there to get off. But sometimes I am in a giving mood, especially if the bottom provided exceptional service. I probably let a bottom cum about 1 out of 4 times.

It’s even more rare for me to hang around long enough to give him a second load, usually about 20 to 30 minutes later. Of course, that requires he suck me some and if a bottom isn’t sure of his cleaning skills, then he’s going to taste a little of his own shit or I’m out the door.

So What’s This Getting At?

Today I’m looking for bottoms and, of course, it results in the usual desperation of four or five contenders before some asshole flags my ad off Craigslist because I dared indicate “bareback” in the text.

Apparently most tops are shitty at their jobs out there, but I have to end up with the bossiest bottoms or just dumb asses who roam the planet playing a game of 20 questions.

Guy 1: “Have a pic?”

Me: “I posted one. Where’s yours? What’s your stats?”

Guy 1: “Send to receive.”

Me: “I posted a pic. Check the ad.”

Guy 1: “Okay. Hot pic. Stats?”

Me: “Did you bother to read the ad?”

Guy 1: “Oh yea. Hot. Where are you?”

My response: “Um. Ad.”

Guy 1: “Oh. Got a place?”

My response: “As it says in the ad, I’M AT WORK. So, no, I don’t have a place. You went to school on a short bus, didn’t you?”

(FYI, that one ended there.)

Guy 2: “Still looking?”

Me: “The ad went up like a few minutes ago. So, yes.”

Guy 2: “Cool. What are you looking for?

Me: “A bottom to breed. Like the ad says.”

Guy 2: “Pic?”

Me: “Posted one. Send yours.”

Guy 2: “You got more pics?”

Me: “Yes, for trade.”

We trade pics at this point.

Guy 2: “You’re pretty big. I’m not sure I can take you.”

Me: “It’s 7 inches. You can sit on it and take your time.”

Guy 2: “I’m really tight.”

Me: “I’m really hard.”

Guy 2: “You got supplies? Condom? Lube?”

Me: “I’ve got lube.”

Guy 2: “We need a condom. Can you pick up one?”

Me: “Dude. What do you think ‘breed’ means?”

Guy 2: “I only do safe. Sorry.”

Me: “Don’t fucking reply to ads with ‘breed’ or ‘bb’ in them.”

Guy 2: “I thought you might make an exception.”

Me: “I don’t.”

(So this one ends.)

Guy 3: “You got a  pic?”

Me: “Posted in the ad?”

Guy 3: “Got a face pic?”

Me: “For trade.”

Guy 3: “Okay.”

We trade face pics.

Guy 3: “I don’t have a lot of time. Got to do this before my roommate gets home. Okay?”

Me: “No problem. Where to?”

10 minutes pass

Guy 3: “What are you looking to get into?”

Me: “Just looking to fuck and breed an ass. Where do I go?”

Another 10 minutes

Guy 3: “I’m at [a vague major crossroads]. Do you have a full body pic?”

Me: “Look, do you want to trade pics or fuck? Where do I go?”

About 5 minutes pass

Guy 3: “Sorry, my roommate will be home soon. Can we do this tomorrow?”

Me: “Do what? Trade vague e-mails while you jerk off?”

(Obviously, this one ends too.)

Guy 4: “Great pic. Here’s mine. Please come over and load me.”

Me: “Where are you at?”

Guy 4: [Provides address and directions.] “When will you be here?”

Me: “About 20 minutes. I’m on my way.”

Guy 4: “Great. Door’s open. Just push it open. In jockstrap and lubed.”

(FYI, he was. But this one has a weird story. Maybe it will be the next post.)

Sounds Like Flakes So Far…

No FlakesYea, it does. But it gets so weird how bottoms get so fucking picky how they want it. It’s all on their conditions when they want it.

Believe me. Read some ads on Craigslist.

I just want to use an ass. Yes, most of these guys where picky losers.

It’s real easy. I tell you who I am, what I want and where I am. Just be a bottom and ready for it. Is it really that difficult?

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