Tag Archives: hatred

The Confessional Is Open

The Confessional Is Open

What have you done?

What have you done that you’re secretly proud? Or that haunts you?

What have you done?

What have you done that gives you a hard-on? Or makes you want to cut off your cock?

What have you done?

What have you done that puts fear in your soul? Or gives you wings?

We all have these secrets. These things that lurk in the corners of our lives.

I’ve actually told many of these on this website. My molestation and how I struggles with dichotomy of the desires of sex and the hatred of the man who did it. Then there’s stealthing and breeding the men who give opportunity in sex clubs.

Here’s your opportunity to tell your story.

The confessional is open. There is no need for your e-mail or anything else. Just post your secret, from the mundane to the mischievous to the malevolent.

Tell the world your sins. You will feel better.

 

star_grey

Long-time readers of my blog might recall this is not the first confessional. Here’s links to previous confessionals:

Here's some ideas

A Message to the Safer Sex Community: Face the Fucking Reality of Bareback Sex

I’m on Scruff and 25-year-old cutie hits me up, basically begging me to fuck him.

It’s rare for that to happen. I’m two decades his senior. Of course, some young ones do chase older men. Usually this much enthusiasm can be attributed to men who recognize me as the writer of this blog. But several minutes into the conversation and nothing about my blog has come up.

After he’s hinting how much he wants his legs lifted into the air and he’s forwarded two photos of men fucking him — both using condoms. I finally cross into the territory of truth.

no bb ever. well, maybe

Even with the little “iBLASTinside” hint, the boy doesn’t connect the dots and, well, it’s a while before I point him to my blog.

He’s one of hundreds. The “safer” hoards who suddenly give up their convictions once they’re away from peer pressure.

Half of Gay Men Admit to Barebacking; The Other Half Lie

Recently, the gay press reported something like half of all gay men reported they barebacked.

The half that said they didn’t? Most of them lied.

I’ll even bet you that if the scientists conducted the study lined up the men with who fucked whom, they’d discover portions of men who had a sexual encounter and a portion would say they barebacked while the other half would say they were “safe.”

This wall of deniability exists. I’ve even seen it (and written about it). It’s not something so bold as stealthing Opens new window of a page on this blog.

I’ve had bottoms ask if I have condoms. I say yes. He comes over and ignores the condom. He just rides my cock. I don’t ask if I can cum inside. I just do.

Just Like the Right Wing & Abstinence

The AIDS and HIV education community have become just like religious conservatives are with sex education and their insistence that only one path exists: Abstinence. The right wing fails to face facts that teenagers will have sex and won’t promote birth control including the pill or condom use. Moreover, if a pregnancy happens to occur, one must carry that baby to term.

But the more progressive want to teach the straight youth of America how to minimize the risk of disease transmission and possible pregnancy.

Condom Nazis haven’t gone progressive at all. They see just one option. Use a condom. They can’t even fathom people refusing to wear the horrible plastic thing that deflates a hardon.

Look, let me make this perfectly clear.

No matter how many public service messages put out that say, “Safe sex is hot sex,” may work on the brain, but it’s not working on the cock.

People just don’t want to face the fact that barebacking is better than sex with a condom. As I compared it once, it’s like standard-definition versus high-definition television Opens new window of a page on this blog.

Reality Check

Men will fuck without condoms. Face it. Stop being judgmental. You can block the #BBBH hashtag Open-New-Window-External on Twitter or defriend them on Facebook, thinking that it’s alienating them. But it’s not. Barebacking is a movement that’s growing.

Again, half of all gay men admit to doing it and that means there’s more who do it. Bareback porn is growing faster than anything else out there.

We have to face these facts. Now let’s find a way to stem the tide of disease transmission while still letting men bareback if they so choose.

This is like handing out clean needles to drug users. It’s controversial. I get that.

But I am not stopping my barebacking. And I am watching hundreds of thousands of men who won’t either.

I’ve got some suggestions for over-the-counter products that should be developed and provided as an option to those who choose to bareback.

lightbulb_on Virus-Killing Lube

Like a spermicidal lubricant, this would be a lube meant to be deadly to HIV and Herpes. If used as lube, it’s a means to help kill any free-floating viruses that come into contact with it. Of course, it’s got to be mild enough for the intestinal lining to handle it but strong enough to kill those little microscopic bugs.

lightbulb_on Accordion Squeeze Bottle Virucidal Douche

Before and after the fuck, the bottom should douche with this mild concoction. Especially in combination with the lube, the more killing of any HIV or Herpes hanging around in the cum. I have a bottom friend who normally carries around an accordion squeeze bottle (like seen here to the right) that he uses after he’s bred to flush out the cum.

I know. There’s something romantic about the DNA staying inside the bottom. And I’ll admit that I like marking my territory.

But I’m coming up with a solution here and this is reasonable.

lightbulb_on Clear or Latex Paint Assliner

Transmission of HIV normally occurs through fissures in the lining of the intestinal walls.

This idea may reduce the sensation of the bottom so it could be bad idea, but like the latex paint people spread on the body or the invisible bandages, the bottom would put this into their ass to create a protective layer to help prevent any issues with the anal cavity.

lightbulb_on Plan B for HIV Available OTC

Plan B refers to the “day after” pill for women who might have gotten pregnant the night before. Because of the controversy around abortion, many jurisdictions and politicians believe life begins at conception. Plan B provides for pregnancy prevention by inhibition of ovulation Open-New-Window-External. In order to get Plan B, a doctor must prescribe it and, in certain jurisdictions, certain women require parental permission.

Likewise, it’s been found that taking antivirals following possible exposure to HIV will inhibit the transmission. Of course, one can go to one’s doctor and request a certain supply, which goes onto one’s insurance, which shows that the patient is participating in what insurance companies consider “high-risk behavior” and will potentially flag that patient from receiving insurance renewals and life insurance, among other benefits.

Creating an over-the-counter option, easily obtained from the pharmacist at a reasonable cost helps long-term and concerns.

A Final Note for Bug-Chasers and Gift-Givers

I am not denying the POZ community at all and those find eroticism in HIV, just as those who find pregnant women sexy. Please.

I’m not advocating or condemning bug-chasing Open-New-Window-External and/or gift-giving Open-New-Window-External.

But what has been obvious to me for far too long just keeps slipping through the mental grasp of those on the other side of this issue. I fear a backlash is coming of gay right-wing hatred, like a Tea Party within our own progressive ranks that would make for radicalization and fractures well beyond what we want to see.

This “no compromise” attitude that’s gridlocked the U.S. government concerns me. I’ve seen it in my own life as I approached GLBT legal groups with my firing for being gay only to be told that they were much too busy focusing on the marriage rights fight to worry about a man fired to being gay. It’s as if the gay rights movement worries more about eating wedding cake than putting food on the table.

I don’t want this to happen to sexual politics.

For those who wish to bareback but don’t wish to chase, here’s some options to protect themselves. It’s as simple as that.

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Condom Versus Bareback Sex

Condom Versus Bareback Sex

I’ve received a couple of e-mails just today from men confronting a crossroads on which path to take. I’m going to share what each had to write.

Being gay is one thing. You are already different and somewhat an outcast for that.

Then if you are into older guys and not guys your own age it’s another thing and another form of alienation.

Oh and then there is leather if you are into kinks and being subservient and being someone’s slave or boy and wearing a collar people thing you are strange.

And add barebacking to the mix and you are basically a fucking alien.

I’d say the only thing you could do more then that is becoming poz then good luck ever finding acceptance.

This young man in his twenties experienced first hand the hatred coming from the gay community for being a barebacker. Unfortunately, someone discovered his enjoyment at raw cock and, poof, all his acceptance in his circle of friends dissipated so quickly, he felt abandoned and forced into burying his urge to go raw. Now, with animosity and a regret, he wrote me thinking I would reject him too because he no longer barebacked.

Peer pressure. What an odd thing.

The other man, in his mid-thirties, wrote to express his newness to fucking raw.

It took me a long time to get to the point of taking raw cock on purpose.  Haven’t moved to all-bare all the time yet.

I still remember the first loads I took.  Was really nervous about it.  But now, I crave my buddies’ loads.  Sometimes I really want to be a cum dump and take all loads.  Haven’t got to that point though.

My Own Journey

In the late 1980s and early 1990s as the AIDS epidemic brought more and more death upon the gay community, I happened to be a fledgling twentysomething myself in South Florida. I lived far away from the big cities and worked way too hard to get to date men, as at the time I thought a Prince Charming still existed on my horizon would come and take me to new heights of love and sex.

You can read of my own sexual exposures by my molester in the Dark Passenger Opens a new window from this blog entries, which at the time, I’d confronted but didn’t face head on as this blog allowed in the years since. Yet as a young journalist at a small newspaper in the heat of the Florida sun, I got to see the worst that can happen to humanity:

  • A 13-year-old middle school student stabbed, snipped and raped (after death)
  • A 19-year-old motorcyclist with his brain scattered a few hundred feet — now I know why they call it “gray matter”
  • Countless shootings and stabbings of people, often for no reason or for some drug deal gone bad
  • Lightning strikes of golfers, kids playing outside or just random people
  • Skinheads and KKK recruiting in the local high schools
  • Vagrants and drunks falling asleep on train tracks to have the locomotive run them over and sever off some body part
  • Whole families driving off roads into ditches and drowning, never exiting the minivan
  • Beach drownings and backyard pool drownings of old and young, accidental or otherwise
  • Wrecks where the jaws of life pried open bloody mangled messes of metal and human fused together
  • Coaches molesting his female players on his championship team
  • And an honors student and latchkey kid, sniffing a spray can protectant, getting high, barfing and dying his backyard

These were not odd occurrences. This happened daily. Sometimes twice or three times. Over the weekend. For more than two years, I watched this carnage and human destruction up close and personal. No college professor prepared me for real blood and body parts and coroners and victim tears and invading people’s privacy to get a few precious words for a quote.

In the midst of all this, I began my own medical issues. My doctor, at the time, asked me if I’d ever been tested for the virus that causes AIDS. I’d developed some odd rash and he had no idea why.

No cocktails existed. As I recall, AZT was even experimental. People I knew who had AIDS would suddenly disappear only to have their obituary appear later due to suicide or some other “illness.” And if my life, just starting out, began with a doctor suggesting that a fucking rash might be HIV.

The test in those days took more than a week to get the results. I worried the whole time. And the whole time I worried, I watched countless people drop dead around me from murder, accident, mayhem and more.

But I didn’t have HIV. I was fine. I would live!

Life seemed brighter. The world seemed better. I didn’t need to worry. Everything would be a-okay. I just needed to be careful. Right? No unsafe sex.

Fuck. I barely had sex anyway. The death and destruction at work kept making sure of that.

I would try to use a condom if sex ever popped up or just let a guy suck me off. And I tried to date. But something just seemed unsettling to me.

Fast-forward

I’d sampled raw sex from the beginning — my first fuck ever Opens a new window from this blog — and a few momentous subsequent fucks Opens a new window from this blog. As I turned over my new leaf following the savior of coming out negative, I found myself slipping up from time to time. Often, it would be someone I really liked (or lusted after).

scruff-go-rawBarebacking happens. Any gay man who hooks up will likely bareback. A recent example to the right. I’ll tell someone I only fuck raw and they’ll change their tune quick.

Recent studies found that about half of all gay men will admit to having bareback sex. But that’s the admission. I believe that number is much higher. The study I’m citing was from a judgmental safer sex education effort and didn’t go at the study neutrally. Someone asked like I did — as you see in this pic or in a way that makes people feel “safe” to answer they’re okay with barebacking — you’ll find more people will admit to going raw.

While the fuck listed here didn’t hesitate, sometimes the bottom will wait a while and come back later with an “all right, I’ll let you fuck me” or “if you promise you’re DDF, you can fuck me.” Sometimes, if I follow through with the fuck, I’ll be asked to pull out.

I pull out…. after I blast inside.

Everyone knows my name, my e-mail address and usually this blog. Why they sometimes miss that fact, I don’t quite get it.

In my experience, those who eventually admit and will allow me to bareback — based on my photos — and knowing my information is about seven out of 10. I believe if I had a photo of an athletic body, younger age and a slightly larger cock, I’d get closer to nine out of 10.

And if I were to bottom, it would be close to 99 percent with those looks.

pornI wrote recently Opens a new window from this blog about a porn star who visited Atlanta during 2012. This performer, who is rather famous and qualifies as a true porn star, would have cost me a big chunk of change. He stars in condom-only porn. He refused to get fucked raw but would gladly fuck raw and, even knowing me and my blog, would breed my ass.

The schedules never meshed and I’m not messing up his career or the opportunity for him to breed me should he return to the ATL.

I believe that some people think it’s more acceptable to be a bareback top.

The more young, the more athletic, the more “healthy” looking, the more likely a raw fuck will happen.

Back to My Story

As I matured and had my experiences with dating and hookups, I had sex both with and without condoms. It’s not like I didn’t know the difference. It’s not like I ignored the choice before me. And every six months or so, I’d endure the long wait to determine if I happened to be HIV positive, worrying about what would happen, what other discrimination might confront me along with the homophobic hatred that already confronted my life.

Medical changes were happening and treatments were improving. People living with HIV didn’t die immediately. I had boyfriends, then partners. And my life progressed. When I would try to use a condom, it wouldn’t always be the most successful experience.

The difference between bareback and condom sex is like standard- and high-definition television. Once you’ve watched high-def, you really can’t stand to go back to the low-definition again. It’s fuzzy. You don’t get as much out of the experience. The sensations aren’t all there. You’re missing a big chunk of the fun. The experience is extremely lacking.

You crave the high-definition. You want to full-on overload that you get from the sensory inputs of going raw.

Anyone who pretends it’s “just as hot” or whatever else is lying.

My two writers know this. And this is the conflict they’re struggling with right now.

To the Twentysomething

You are a barebacker and you know the risks that come with it. You might pretend for the sake of your so-called friends that you want to wrap it up. However, what kind of friends are they really?

Maintaining a little separation of your sex life and your professional life makes a great deal of sense. But your gay friends cannot all say they hate you because you bareback. If they do, they’re not truly your friends (and it’s time to find some new ones). Barebacking is a choice.

I will say if you choose to use a condom, it’s fine with me. If I know someone makes a logical choice based on the facts in front of them, then I can only respect their choices.

Further, allow me to say Atlanta isn’t the best choice for the Leather Community. It is a small community and the choices are limiting, unlike larger cities where Leather has a larger presence — Chicago for one. I’d suggest you broaden your circle of friends and you’ll find several barebacking members in within BDSM circles.

And should you ever become poz, I promise you won’t be alienated either. There’s a special bond between poz men (I’m sure some of them will speak out).

To the Thirtysomething

You too are coming into your own, now that you’ve seen the greener grasses of barebacking. Even with your limited experience, you know that the sensory experience of going raw just can’t compare with wrapping plastic around a cock and sliding it into a hole. That separation blurs the enjoyment.

Can you truly make that choice?

Why I Made the Choice

As I wrote earlier, I was unprepared for the death, destruction and hatred I would see on a day-to-day experience. Compound that with my molestation, and you come to a place where I struggled to find intimacy and connections with men that simply didn’t not transfer through the plastic barriers of a condom.

Why would I choose to live a life hidden from those sensations I craved and deny myself the thing I wanted? Why especially when I knew it all could be snatched away in a moment due to lightning, an accident, a gunshot, a stabbing or some other act of fate that would take thousands every year but somehow spare me?

One of the oddest occurrences that still baffles me is the person who writes me and wants me to fuck him — but insists I use a condom. Oh, he’s  read my blog. He knows I only fuck raw. He’s aware that “I blast inside.” But he considers himself cute enough, muscular enough, hung enough, young enough, funny enough or some other talent enough that he will be the exception to my rule to fuck raw. He is special enough that he will escape my raw breeding. I won’t stealth him either. I’ll be honorable and fuck safely.

No chance in hell.

And if you think a car accident, a home invasion, a stray bullet, a blood clot, a drowning or some other death or destruction element will miss you — that you’re special enough that God will spare you — then I spent two years in South Florida meeting the people who thought the same thing.

Life is meant to be lives in high definition. That’s where I live it.

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Stealthing, Stealth, Stealth Fucking

Deceptive Practices

Freedom to fuck. I love to fuck. The first moment my raw cock slides inside an ass provides for among the most amazing moments ever, second only to those precious, time-deceptive pulses of my cock as sperm surges from my balls, combines with more bodily fluids in my prostrate and then forces through my urethra and out my cock into the warm folds of a man’s ass.

The fuck session can be powerful with the overwhelming senses from the tip of my cock to my entire body, depending on the talent of a bottom.

Along with my recent post Opens a new window from this blog about the rise of the bareback adverse and their belief that we of the raw-fucking-clan are out to indoctrinate the youth without comprehending the so-perceived consequences, I’ve been the target for particular hatred for my stance on stealthing Opens a new window from this blog. Interestingly enough, some posts by contributors Opens a new window from this blog  that are clearly designated Opens a new window from this blog have been attributed to me by condom Nazi Link Opens in a New Window blogs.

(I don’t link to these non-bareback blogs because I’m not sending them the traffic like they’re sending me here. I’ve got two already that are on track to make my December Top 10 list as referrals Opens a new window from this blog but they won’t get listed by name at all.)

Although I write a lot about stealthing, what it is and isn’t Opens a new window from this blog, how to do it Opens a new window from this blog and I’ve even debated it with other barebackers Opens a new window from this blog, the vicious attacks are coming against me for it more than anything (I do not post threats or anonymous attacking comments either).

I wanted to clarify a few things about my stealthing practice. It probably won’t do any good, but I’ve hinted to my readers. I imagine some of you are smart enough to read between the lines but just haven’t bothered to comment back.

Here goes:

I never agree to use a condom

The bottom makes an assumption that handing me a condom means I’ll use it. I am a man of my word. In this case, I never give my word. It’s a lie of omission. I omit the condom. The mistake is assuming that in the dark or in some anonymous sex situation, a perfect stranger will use a condom. I will not.

The bottom and I “meet” at a sex club, adult bookstore or some other semi-public hook-up spot

I don’t stealth every fuck. It’s rare. That said, none of my online profiles says I’m into “safe sex” or suggest I prefer “safer sex.”

I rarely bring condoms anymore. I’ve gotten more lazy about it, but if I’ve decided to fuck you and you think this guy who stuck his cock through a gloryhole and you’ve been sucking on for the last five minutes is going to adhere to the honor code you’ve composed in your mind, you’ve got another thing coming. Or should I say, you’ve got something cumming up your ass.

If you ask me whether I’ll fuck you safe or use a condom, my answer will be, “No”

I never lie directly. Even with online discussions, I will tell you straightforward that I will not use condoms, I do not wear condoms and I will not compromise on this.

Nine times out of ten, the bottom will come around and eventually ask me to fuck him. Sometimes, at the last second, after I’ve been fucking him for 10 minutes, he’ll ask me to pull out to cum. The smart ones know this is time to pull off my cock and not let me back into their ass because I never answer to the pullout.

I always blast inside. Duh.

If they’ve paid attention to my e-mail or my online name, they know this, but most think themselves special and that I’ll consider them the exception and do it just for them. In fact, I’ve had men ask me to make them the exception. I’ve responded that they need to make me the exception.

I have never caused a status change or knowingly transmitted any disease to anyone

Most assume I’m violating some law or doing some harm. I haven’t. I don’t. Doesn’t matter whether you think I’m honest or not, I’m writing this with a very clear conscious.

          

I’ve never attempted to be so very clear about my approach to stealthing. I don’t imaging I will stop stealthing. I’ll tell you why. For all the sensation of the physical, there’s a mental one I get when I breed an ass. Denying that to me denies me that pleasure of planting my DNA inside someone. The fact I know I’m putting the essence of who I am inside someone — especially since I’ll never get a girl pregnant — is a powerful aphrodisiac.

The condom denies me this. Since I’ve said I am a barebacker, I want to fuck bareback, when a bottom takes that control from me and assumes that I’ll just accept wearing a condom, it generally pisses me off.

When did the default position for fucking become with a condom? Even the safe sex advocates believe people should discuss this shit before hand.

There’s a power trip, sure, but I get that power trip with every fuck. Stealthing someone isn’t a special power trip. I’m not getting off more because I’ve slipped off the plastic or snapped off the receptacle end.

I’m just putting the DNA where it belongs, where I’m naturally inclined to put it. I’m like the Pope of Barebacking. No condoms ever. Every sperm is sacred. Jizzjoy Link Opens in a New Window is meant to be experienced.

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Feedback on the Grindr Hate Message for the 23-Year-Old Openly POZ Barebacker

Feedback on the Grindr Hate Message for the 23-Year-Old Openly POZ Barebacker

Recently I posted a screenshot from Grindr sent to an openly POZ barebacker who happened to be online in Pittsburgh recently. The young man, who asked me not to use his name or photo, sent me the screenshot. He’d been floored.

Since turning HIV-positive a few years prior, he’d been honest with everyone online about his status as well as his preference to bareback. The result hadn’t been as much acceptance as there had been scorn, like this example.

I’d asked iBLASTinside readers to respond and some of you did. I wish a few more would, but here’s what I’ve received so far…

          

Those Who Protest Too Much

Andre wrote on 28 June 2012:

I don’t see what the fuss is about barebacking … it’s a personal choice and more than likely the a-hole who text those messages in the image above probably barebacks as well, when push comes to shove … you know what they say about those who protest too much …

          

Kudos to Leather Pup

Mindtrip wrote on 28 June 2012:

And people wonder why guys are lead to lie about their status.

It’s not just rejection; it is this hatred and disdain that leads to fear.

Kudos to this leather pup for his honesty to himself and to others.

          

Report and Block his Punk Ass

SeaGuy wrote on 29 June 2012: 

People who send messages like the one above to someone they do not know, attacking that person for the lifestyle they lead, are usually pathetic individuals who hate themselves for partaking in the particular lifestyle choice they are so against.

They also tend to not have anything else going on in their life. I don’t know of anyone in my life who has a hobby attacking strangers for barebacking. I would just report that pathetic hater for hate speech to Grindr then block his punk ass. He’s so pathetic it’s not worth your time to dwell on it.

          

Meet this Shit with Payback

HungLatinDom posted on 28 June 2012:

You should post the Grindr profile of the guy too. This kind of shit must be met with a payback. That kind of hate cannot be let unbound and with no response.

I pity the jerk, in any case. This kind of person hates us because we spoil their perfect life; if it would not be because filthy fags like us, he could have plenty of bareback sex. He wants it, he can’t have it, we are to blame. WHEN (not if) he gets poz, it’s gonna be ugly. I have seen it before, but it’s fair payback. All that hate is in their minds, nobody else is to blame.

When I seroconverted, I took it rather well. I made my life better in some aspects and realize some things. I never discriminated against poz gays, I was in peace with myself. Haters like him don’t have that advantage and they realize they turned into something they hate violently.

A Note from Mark

When I received the screenshot, I asked for the guy’s photo if the young pup had it. Like most chicken shits, he’d never uploaded a photo and, as you see in the image, never chosen a name for himself. Believe me, if I’d had any further information, I’d gladly have published it.  

          

Payback Is Not Cool

GermanFucker wrote on 28 June 2012: 

Someone who is open about his barebacking habits and his serostatus deserves all the respect and praise in the world, just like those who lie and mislead in order to infect deserve the scorn of the community. If you are open about barebacking and HIV everybody else can make his own decisions and will eventually realize that there are a lot of poz people out there and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with them. (And that if you want to be on the safe side, you can use a condom.)

However I find language like, “This kind of shit must be met with a payback,” dangerous and frightening.

Dude is a moron and a hater. He deserves to be ridiculed, made fun off and exposed for the douche he is. More than that he should be educated. What would not be ok is if someone went out and tried to poz the guy. There are limits. Calling it “payback” is a bit too much of a blank cheque. Not cool.

          

Karma Will Get Him

gd wrote on 28 June 2012 

This kid is probably going to get what he deserves. He is going to piss off a guy he shouldn’t about barebacking and he is going to get it. It’s that-asshole-better-than-thou attitude that guys hate. It’s one thing to disagree but another to hate and be so forceful about your view and so cryptic and dangerous.

I’ll admit it I am not really that much of a barebacker. I want to do it more but I am nervous and afraid. It’s sort of on hold right now. However sometimes I get messages from poz or undectable tops even though it’s in my profile I am not into that.

I don’t tell them to go die in a hole or go to AIDS country or anything like that. I tell them how flattered I am but I would rather try to play with neg guys (even though guys lie).

Some of them are okay but some get pissed. Some guys have called me a stupid naïve asshole for thinking that it’s okay to bareback with neg guys because all guys are poz and I am going to get pozzed anyways so I might as well do it with him. How romantic.

Everyone has their own view of barebacking.

Some guys don’t care about status and do it with anyone. Some guys are cum dumps. Some care about the status, and some are afraid to bareback.

I have nothing against poz guys or undetectable guys. Some I have talked to seem so nice and knowledgeable that I feel I am at fault for turning them down sometimes. But I don’t want to be poz. It might happen one day but I am really young and I want to stay neg for as long as I can. Safest way to do that right now is limit going raw tremendously. I really wanted to go to that CumUnion thing though but that would be dangerous.

I actually respect tops and bottoms both who, with their heart and mind, decide that they want to bareback and are not ashamed or afraid of it and don’t give a damn what others’ think. It’s their choice, their right, and their life and they don’t pussyfoot about it or make excuses.

But guys like this asshole on Grindr? He’ll say the same thing about an older guy or a guy he considers ugly.

Karma will get him.

          

I Enjoy Raw Sex Too Much to Wait for Love

Pete wrote on 28 June 2012:

I’m a recent convert to the (openly) bareback camp (with much thanks to this website for the encouragement to do it).

While I won’t be telling friends and family I’m doing it (that would just bring on worry I don’t think is necessary), I will be openly asking people I meet online if they will bareback (and if they are negative, although not asking hasn’t stopped me in the past). I’m just going to use my smarts to see if I think the person is being honest with me. I’m a pretty good judge of character.

As for the feeling guilty or having people possibly hate me for not understanding why I won’t practice safe sex, I made myself think about why I was doing it and came up with this as my excuse if I’m ever asked: If society will only possibly accept sex without a condom within a monogamous relationship, then I’m not willing to wait until I find someone to do that with.

I enjoy raw sex too much to wait for a love that may not come. Love is fleeting and hard to seek; sex is easy and fun, if done with the right partner(s).

You’re only hurting yourself if you believe you are. Yes, there are people out there who won’t ever be honest and try to stealth and make others poz; while I don’t agree with that, I do find the stories that involve on this site incredibly hot (so I can’t really judge). It’s totally the taboo nature of subverting the person who doesn’t want to “give in” and making it happen regardless. It’s bold & selfish, but incredibly intoxicating.

Life is worth living when you can just be yourself. Thanks to the commenters on this site for making me feel proud for doing it.

          

Doing What Cums Naturally

Versatile RAW Piggy Bottom wrote on 29 June 2012: 

It is a shame that the person contacted you and showed how much hate he has for people who are honest in what they like and want. Most likely he is hating his own life and has to spread that hate onto others — and especially to those doing what he desires to do. Have sex naturally….bareback.

Much Love & Support!

          

Disgusting

Jonas wrote on 29 June 2012:

That’s disgusting. I mean this guy clearly did nothing wrong, so he should never get messages like that.

I hate shortsighted people.

          

 

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