Tag Archives: dichotomy

The Confessional Is Open

The Confessional Is Open

What have you done?

What have you done that you’re secretly proud? Or that haunts you?

What have you done?

What have you done that gives you a hard-on? Or makes you want to cut off your cock?

What have you done?

What have you done that puts fear in your soul? Or gives you wings?

We all have these secrets. These things that lurk in the corners of our lives.

I’ve actually told many of these on this website. My molestation and how I struggles with dichotomy of the desires of sex and the hatred of the man who did it. Then there’s stealthing and breeding the men who give opportunity in sex clubs.

Here’s your opportunity to tell your story.

The confessional is open. There is no need for your e-mail or anything else. Just post your secret, from the mundane to the mischievous to the malevolent.

Tell the world your sins. You will feel better.

 

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Long-time readers of my blog might recall this is not the first confessional. Here’s links to previous confessionals:

Grindin’ Ass Raw: How Quickly ‘Safer’ Bottoms Go Raw

Grindin’ Ass Raw: How Quickly ‘Safer’ Bottoms Go Raw

Raw-or-wrapped-2How much I love asking the question, “Raw or wrapped?’

If I’m on Grindr or Scruff or Manhunt (I’ve got a free trial) or Craigslist, it’s a question that’s bound to come up. And ever-so-quickly, as soon as it does, the response about half the time is “wrapped” or “safe.”

Fuck, just look at the young man to the right — he wrote “Always safe.”

And I wrote, “Oh. Too bad. I’m not.”

Immediately — not even a minute passed — before he said he’d fuck raw.

Recently, a survey found about half of all gay men said they fucked bareback while the other half said they fucked safe. This is a flawed study because, I believe, when confronted with someone a bottom want to fuck him, he’ll go raw almost every time.

Believe me, I get more ass this way.

A lot of you may think I’m out there stealthing ass Opens new window of a page on this blog left and right. No. I’m not. I only do that at sex clubs, adult bookstores or bathhouses where anonymous hook-ups are rampant and, even then, it’s rare.

Most everywhere else, the horny man will go raw without hesitation.

The Tanned, Tattooed Lasian

I’m downtown running errands and, whenever that happens, I see that as an opportunity to get some. Honestly, Grindr and Scruff are hit and miss. Plus it’s a Wednesday in Atlanta Opens new window of a page on this blog and I know that’s a craptastic day.

But the common chime goes off on the ole iPhone and I begin chatting it up with what looks to be a light-skinned Latino.

If you’ve been reading my blog, you know I have a thing about exotics — any Asian or Latin flavor. Well, we all also know I’m an equal opportunity fucker Opens new window of a page on this blog, glad to breed most any ass.

The 27-year-old had shitty photos, but it didn’t much matter to me. He’d turned off his distance meter but seemed pretty damn close. And we were getting along. He liked my cock shots. He asked me to come over to fuck him.

Raw-or-wrapped“Raw or wrapped?” I asked.

“Wrapped.”

I turned him down, letting him know I just fucked raw.

Now I expect bottoms to come back with an invitation anyway, but his response shocked even me.

“Okay, well, you can fuck me raw as long as you cum in me,” he typed.

“I have no problem breeding your ass,” I wrote back.

Soon I had an address and was on my way.

Turned out I was only 3 minutes away from his apartment complex. He answered the door with just a towel.

A 6-feet tall, this beefy man’s wide, smooth chest looked just meaty and delicious. He was deeply tanned. And those horrible photos just couldn’t make up for the vision before me. Tattoos scattered his body. In fact, throughout our session, every move would cause me to discover a new tattoo — he had at least a dozen. Some as small as a dime while others were much larger.

His nipples pointed down toward his belly.

He escorted me to the bedroom and dropped his towel while I began taking off my clothes. His large flat nose gave him a Hawaiian look but the Asian truly stood out. That is, as he jacked his uncut cock and it stood up a rigid 8 inches and very wide.

Now that wasn’t Asian cock. It was truly Latin.

We went down to business, him snorting my poppers Opens new window of a page on this blog, sucking my cock, kissing me with his luscious thick lips and begging very soon for me to eat his ass and fuck him.

His legs and ass were covered with dark, wiry hair (again, symptoms of Latin descent). I worked his hole just a little before he wanted my rock hard cock inside him. His padded tanned skin next to my mighty white seemed like an odd dichotomy, but it worked as my cock slipped inside and he snorted more on those poppers.

With him on his back, my cock thrusting inside him, he soon began begging for my nut.

“You want it already?” I said, knowing we’d only been fucking a few minutes. But I was on errands and didn’t have long. But I didn’t mind making this a quick one. As fast as he was jerking his cock, I knew I wouldn’t have long anyway.

“Breed me man,” he said.

I snorted the poppers now and went plunging over the edge.

I bred his ass, pushing my cum inside him and letting him know he’d gotten my load. Then I pulled out and dressed.

“Damn,” he said. “Thanks. I’ve been looking all day for someone to come over and fuck me. You were the first one serious enough to do it.”

“Glad to help out,” I said.

And I left.

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Children Are Petri Dishes of Walking Colds, Flu and Worse

Children Are Petri Dishes of Walking Colds, Flu and Worse

I love my nephew. At 3½ years old, he’s among the highlights of my life. I am one of his surrogate fathers as his real father has largely abandoned him for drugs.

One of the few bonuses of my increased time at home is I get to spend a lot more time with this adorable creature, who will grow up absolutely gorgeous and totally straight. Yes, I can tell from an early age. I read men (and boys) quickly and can easily categorize them Opens a new window from this blog.

And despite what you may think, I will never touch my nephew in an inappropriate way and if I find someone who does, I will finally make good on the promise I made to my molester Opens a new window from this blog. Death at my own hands.

If you’ve read my Dark Passenger Opens a new window from this blog series, you will know about my own molestation and the suffering dichotomy that resulted from a gay boy emerging early into sexual manhood. This blog wasn’t intended just to advocate for barebacking. I started it to explore and reconcile the psycho-sexual and emotional damage and figure out where I needed my life to go.

I’ve gotten off on a bit of a tangent because of the medicine I’m taking plus the fact I didn’t get much of a night’s sleep thanks to coughing, congestion and headaches.

My adorable nephew gave me the only thing he could give me all by himself: His cold.

Now with that virus coursing through me and surrounding the general area, I’m forced to take it easy. Last night happened to be Atlanta’s CumUnion Opens a new window from this blog that I’d hoped to finally attend. Again Opens a new window from this blog, it coincided with a full moon on Friday Opens a new window from this blog, which tends to increase horniness. Add to that a lot of men are “visiting” family, so the opportunity to fucking more ass is available.

Believe it or not, while I’m horny and, with drugs, can stand upright and generally feel okay. Believe it or not, even though I have only 99° temperature (not even 99.1°, just 99°), I’m staying home and away from others.

If I can help it, no one else gets this cold.

While some twits seem to think I’m out changing people’s statuses by stealthing Opens a new window from this blog and passing along STDs, I am not. As I wrote recently Opens a new window from this blog, if I stealth, they leave with the same status as they had prior to my fucking them.

In this case, I won’t fuck them and no one will suffer through an ordinary cold. Except me.

Travel Diary: Like Ships Passing…

Travel Diary: Like Ships Passing…

A rarity indeed to find a man taller than I. His arrival had become doubtful after more than an hour had passed since our last communication, but when his knock came and I opened the door, all hesitation dropped. At 23, his broad shoulders defied his lanky frame. A dichotomy of beefy arms but thin basketball fingers. An age so young but a mouth so talented as he sucked my cock deeply as if he’d been trained in some southern Asian massage house.

His shyness gave way with prying from me as I wanted to see his chest, which proved worth while. Large round nipples with a dusting a dark hair but this perfection of a treasure trail from mid-pecs to pubes, inside which hid his cock. A grower, I wondered. But I let him suck me more. He seemed service-oriented and who be I to deny him his hunger?

But after a while, I did. I turned him onto his back and finally kissed him, the bitter starkness of the mixture of Crest and my own crotch seemed odd against my beard and his goatee. Yet a sweetness came through. We kissed a long while. Odd, since he seemed uninterested. His eyes stayed closed so I let him keep his fantasy of whatever man or creature he imagined he might be fucking. Here I spent my time enjoying the details of his being and taking in those nipples and that treasure trail. I lingered to find his limpness, but it did no good. He never hardened. So I moved on and tongued his balls only to work my way lower.

No resistance.

When my tongue first tickled his hole, his mouth opened and released a noise — not loud, mind you, but it was the first one uttered from his mouth other than the sloppy tones of sucking my cock. As my tongue darted into the folds of his skin and penetrated into that puckered darkness, more utterances escaped. So I began adding spit. Enough to make sure I would be able to do what I planned next.

When I came up for air was when I noticed his cock had risen as well. Not full-mast mind you. But it peaked from the dark thatch. As I kissed him, my cock found his spit-soaked hole and, without resistance, slipped just inside. Not all the way in, mind you. Just inside.

His eyes opened. Chocolate brown irises stared at me. He didn’t come off my cock. He didn’t move. So I applied a little more pressure and my cock slipped past that place of tightness into him. His eyes widened and then I knew.

He no longer fantasized about anyone else fucking him.

Into him more deeply, my cock penetrated and I fucked with a slow passion, only the spit between us. Kissing. Faster. Slower. I never slammed him. He was never that kind of fuck. We even talked a long while, my cock hard inside him. We liked how it felt to be connected.

When I came, he rode me. When he came, he rode me. Our moments criss-crossed within seconds of one another. No excuses, no discussions, we knew we were the proverbial ships passing in the night.

Dichotomy, Part I

Dichotomy, Part I

People have pointed out my own dichotomy, but let’s consider their own. An interesting example is “Ray,” who contacted me just this past week. His first e-mail:

I am a Malaysian Chinese, living and working in B’ham, AL. Let me know when you are in town the next time. We can go get together and hang out? Just want to be friend with you.

Now I enjoy a little Asian in my life and having a good Birmingham fuck might be just the ticket. But he soon made it clear that our options were limited when I asked if he wanted to get fucked.

Only if you put on a rubber…. haha, which i understand that you only go bare. My ex and i used to go bare. Well, i just want to be your friend first. A good friend that can hang out and do some other things besides having sex…

Truth be told, I wouldn’t mind getting to know someone in Birmingham. I go there enough. So, as I tend to do, I ask for a photograph. His response were four photos, all quite similar to this one:

A bikini brief Asian

I pointed out to him the dichotomy. He wants to become friends and not get fucked by me but sends those photos. His response:

you didn’t say what type of pictures you want to see so i sent you pictures of my crotch on purpose, just to get your attention. I see you are a meet and fuck kinda person instead of meet and talk kinda person? call me weirdo, i cannot let people fuck me unless i get to know the other person first. Personally, i think you are a deeper person than what you portrayed on IBI. I read that you have so much disappointment with the hookups you tried to make while you were in B’ham. i thought have a “normal” friend in B’ham might make your stay over here more pleasant. That’s just the caring side of me talking, not my horny side.

So send me a regular photo of your face then! We chatted on Gtalk for a bit today, but in the end, his face was off limits but I could see his panty-clad crotch for days.

WTF.