Q&A: The Real Problem Isn’t the Bottom

Q&A: The Real Problem Isn’t the Bottom

A ‘Top’ Asks for Advice

QuestionHey there Mark,

Sorry to bother you, sir.

I’ve been friends with this boy since we were kids and we are both gay. Well I’m gay and he is bi, he says, I think he is just addicted to sex. We fool around and stuff but I want more.

I always take him out to eat because he can’t pay rent. I always buy him clothes for job interviews even though he can’t hold a job. He is too young and dumb, he flunks out at school.

When we go to bars, guys lie to him all the time and he believes them and fights with me even though I feel like I am the only one protecting him.

(When we were 16, a group of forthysomething guys online invited him to a conversion party with him as the “guest of honor. He was going to go until I Googled what “conversion party” meant, then he didn’t go. That’s how dumb he is.)

I am annoyed because I feel like he owes me his pussy. I feel like I have put in the effort and I want what’s mine but he won’t bottom for me sober and he INSISTS on condoms.

Just typing that makes me mad.

I hate condoms, but he knows that and thinks I’m a whore. He gets way more action then me and he always leaves the bar with a different, masculine top (I am surprised they all adhere to his no bareback rule).

I don’t mind sharing his hole at all. In fact, the more the better! I just want in it.

Anyway, you are a true inspiration and I am hoping you have some advice for me, anything helps!

Frustrated Top, Tony in Minnesota

Answer from Mark

ATops are never “owed” ass. Tops take ass.

Nut up. Why are you taking this pussy’s bullshit?

You’re not a top. You’re worse than a pussy-whipped straight guy.

This little fucker is getting it raw. He’s a little demanding, bossy bottom and he gets away with it because no one has the balls to put the fucker in his place.

He needs fucked and bred. But you’re not the man to do it.

It’s time you admitted the truth. You’re a fucking bottom. Oh, I know it hurts a little when the cock slides inside. But you’re all weepy and lovey-dovey over a piece of ass.

And you haven’t owned it.

You do not have the capability or the instinct to be a true, natural top. It’s time you gave it up and started training your ass to take it.

Fuck, if you were paying for all my shit, I’d play dumb, coy and forbid you from fucking me raw. It keeps you chasing after me.

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  1. Wow, that was one harsh response but I get it.
    I think the Bottom does indeed “owe” it to this guy. All Bottoms, if they’re real Bottoms, owe it to any and every Top.
    But it’s on the Top to TAKE what is owed. To show the Bottom his place and real function: To be used and filled by Cock.
    My two cents.
    Great post!

  2. Mark, I have finally learned to refrain from giving advice that is unsolicited. In other words, if someone does NOT ask me, “What do you think?” then I keep my mouth shut, and my fingers off the keyboard.

    However, I can honestly say that I would not tolerate this. This so-called friend of “Frustrated Top Tony” is NOT. A. FRIEND! I cannot imagine doing this to a friend. Hell! There have been times when i needed to ask a friend for a loan, and it bothers me so much I can barely speak. And seeing this bottom leaving the bars with yet another guy sounds like a great way to destroy one’s Self-Love and Self-Esteem.

    Mark, I totally get what you mean and I fully agree: tops are not “owed” ass, they take it, and I certainly have no problem taking a piece of ass, mancunt or boypussy when I feel like it.

    In fact, recently a guy contacted me on Growlr telling me he wanted a quickie, and I told him I AM a Capricorn (Sign of the Horny Goat) and Cuban; there are no such things as “quickies” with me.

    Another guy told me that all he wanted me to do was suck his dick; and I told him that if he comes to my home, I AM fucking his ass. Did not hear from him after that. Oh, well.

    Oh, what the hell! “Tony from Montana,” you deserve much better.