Travel Diary, Day 1: Flakes Are Universal

greetings-from-san-antonio-texas
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I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. I posted the first ad of the trip on Craigslist. When you’re “new meat” in a town, the e-mails appear to flood in. A couple of nice responses appeared (including the non-identifying hottie whose photo is included below.

The usual pic collectors and non-sense e-mail responses popped in (I mean, how does one respond to a single line e-mail, “Dude that sounds hot!”). After a while, only a few kept the back-and-forth coming to seem serious enough to pursue.

Then one disappeared. And the other, after the invitation to visit, decided it was “too late.”

Too late. We started e-mailing around 9:30. Just because you don’t have the balls to show up, don’t give me the “too late” excuse. What he really means is, “I’m getting a bit knackered and, if you were a little better looking, I’d actually get off my lazy ass and come over to let you fuck me. But you’re not so I won’t.”

So I filled my night attempting to watch low-definition television programs on a high-definition flat screen (Dear Big Name Hotels, I’m glad you’ve got nice TVs, now splurge for HD programming).

This morning I awoke to the following note in my e-mail.

BABE,
Your fantasy is wonderful and I hope it happens for you, BUT this is SA — a town full of queens, whores and people that think they are WAY prettier than they really are. Hope you get lucky.

That confirms my suspicions.

So what are my next steps? Obviously, the anonymous fantasy approach didn’t work. I wonder what will. Suggestions welcome.

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